More kids = attention divided
I’m of the opinion that no one’s first child parenting strategy survives the arrival of a second child; I just don’t see how it’s possible. Second child to third, maybe, but not first to second. With the first child, you give all of your parenting and childcare attention to that one child. When more children come along, that attention gets divided among all the kids. Then it becomes life-in-motion.
I’m finding it important to recognize the most valuable things that I did with my first child and cover those bases with the second one. Right now, that’s praying daily, reading before bed and teaching how to keep the mouth open while brushing teeth.
And it’s really amazing how personalities differ. My second son is much more set in his way. It can come off as stubborn and even defiant at times. But that’s not the whole all of it. He’s incredibly affectionate and loves to help. I’ve realized getting him to “sit still” during diaper changes is a futile effort – but asking him to “help Daddy” with changing is a whole different game. It’s astonishing how a subtle shift can produce a big impact on outcome.
Prediction for the future
I predict that media and how we consume it will change dramatically in the coming years. Maybe 2 years, maybe 10. I think it will all become more interactive. Well, not all media but new forms of media will rise.
Contrast YouTube and all its features, with the rotary telephone in its peak popularity. And yes, I linked that for the newbs here. Phones were strictly a conversational tool and entertainment was derived from that engagement. Now entertainment means glaring at a screen, watching and listening, but not talking or exercising that part of the mind used to speak and build rapport with another.
I think the future will still have the YouTubes and TikToks of its time. But there will be more. Interactive videos that tell a story with your involvement, driven by Ai, creating totally original content unique to the user, to the moment, to the experience. It might be ephemeral, in that it just goes away afterward, never to be seen or experienced like that again. Much in the same way that ChatGPT can give you 15 ideas and you’ll only choose one in the end.
Or a podcast that you can interrupt with your own question.
Or a stand-up comedy show or politician on TV that you can heckle and interact.
Or it could be completely different from this. But I think that’s in the near future. Let’s see.
Show and Tell
Are you smarter than a kindergartner? My son is in Pre-K and has to take a toy to school each week and show it to the class. Each toy must fit into a gallon-sized bag, and before revealing it, he gives three clues to the class to try and guess what it is.
- It has strings.
- It has a handle.
- You can play it.
Psychopaths are moochers
“Attention is the glue between reality and memory.”
— Julia Shaw, criminal psychologist and guest on Lex Fridman.
This episode, Lex interviewed renowned criminal psychologist and psychopathy expert Dr. Julia Shaw to uncover a wealth of discovery about how criminals think.
I was surprised to find that “psychopaths” in the diagnosable sense, aren’t necessarily criminal masterminds. Quite the contrary in fact. Most tend to be deeply disturbed and learn how to manipulate in rudimentary ways, rather than orchestrating like a master puppeteer.
I also discovered that the vast majority of murder is spontaneous and not planned. Like, above 90%. I suppose judging by movies and TV, I have a disproportionate sense for what a murderer looks like. It’s a spouse. It’s a teen inducted to a gang. It’s the result of a squabble over something totally meaningless. It’s the result of an uncontrolled ego.
And they didn’t just talk murder. Dr. Shaw also discusses sexual fetishes (and their lack of connection to criminal behavior), and perhaps more interestingly, memory. What we give our attention to in the present is what binds our memories to reality. Just like you can sit in your living room imagining in your mind that you’re car racing, and give yourself an adrenaline boost, your mind stores these “fake” events as memories, written in the annals of your mind.
Shaw also explains how memories can be tainted, how and when they’re unreliable, and that governments today are actively exploiting memory manipulation at the societal level. That’s wild. And totally believable.